The Past Tense Of Youth

The Charade

A line of carriages arrived bearing the wives of the Sultan. We all ran to the window to see them. It seemed as if all of Topkapi was moving to Yildiz palace that night. As they entered the Great Hall Rana joined them. When the guards had returned almost two hours later they were dismayed to find Rana amongst us. Rana explained in her sultry voic,e which seemed to drive them mad with desire, that she had in fact been feeling out of sorts and had merely retired to her chamber for a rest.

The guards had been constrained because the private chambers of the Sultan’s consorts were off limits to any man other than the Sultan. None would dare tell that they had not found her and when ‘Hamdi Bey’ returned he was informed that Rana had actually fainted backstage and Jamal had taken her to her room. Gurol, who was now once again an officer, had joined the military guards in quarters directly opposite the harem pavilion. He had easily found his way to Rana’s boudoir, managing to sneak through the gardens hiding behind the tall poplar trees. No -one saw him climb through the window and into her bed. The high walls surrounding Yildiz Palace may have been the reason for ‘Hamdi Bey’s’ preference for it as a place to entertain guests. Not only was it away from the prying eyes of his servants but its location would also limit the possibilities of a seaside attack. We did not yet know that there were plans to make this palace our new home.

Yildiz palace overlooked two other palaces down the hill and close to the waters edge. ‘Dolmobache and Ciragen palaces were much grander but maybe not as safe as Yildiz and, though the walls seemed to reach way up to the clouds, there were gaps in the stone work from which we could glimpse the sea. There was also a bridge which connected the palace with Ciragen but this was off limits to us.

Inside the walls there were manicured gardens weaved around pavilions.There were courtyards with pools, greenhouses and aviaries with rare birds such as the Hoopoe, the Blue Parrot, and the Hunkari, a frill pigeon trained for racing. These birds were greatly prized and sought after. I had once overheard a conversation between a buyer and vendor in the marketplace. The buyer described the bird he wanted thus…

“It must have an arched forehead with large, bright, prominent eyes. It’s breast must be broad and well rounded and its body firm and compact. Plumage must be well developed, smooth and even”.
It was sometime before I realised they were speaking of pigeons and not of women. These caged birds symbolised believers eager to be liberated from their mortal coils. Setting them free would earn them points in heaven.
Strange that these believers could not see the parallels between captured birds and captured women.

Copyright By Renee Dallow ( Author )

Rizzo The Mezzapica Dog

A Story Of Lost And Found

Rizzo had wandered all alone

Miles away and far from home

A little white terrier

Full of life and very smart

Where had he come from?

No-one knew.

No-one cared.

Alone on the streets this dog was lost

Eating morsels that had been tossed

Into the gutter

Or even worse

Road kill recently dead

One day they found him

Lying there

Like a sewer rat

No-one cared

No welcome mat

No bed

Then the council people came

Put him in a cage

At a place called Barcs

Then a foster family came

Took him home for a feed

BUT COULDN’T KEEP HIM LONG

He had so much need

To be loved

They simply couldn’t cope

Poor Rizzo cried

Began to lose hope

One day a lovely lady came

She was pretty cool

Adopted him and took him home

Rizzo got agro

But she was no fool

Took him to cafes

Rizzo got upset

He didn’t like

Other people’s pets

So a trainer was called

To train them both

It took some time

But Rizzo came round

Never again to be lost and found

An orphan in the doggy pound.

Not all cafes rated the same

Some too snooty

Some too tame

But soon they found the perfect fit

Mezzapica was it’s name

With his new friends

Lina, Andrew, Brasha, and the rest

Rizzo rates this one the best

Every day he leads his owner there

For a latte and croissant

He knows he is loved

And soon will have his own blog

Rizzo The Mezzapica Dog.

By Renee Dallow ( Owner Of Rizzo. )

The Past Tense Of Youth: Topkapi Palace

Background To The Novel

Like Emma in the novel, The Past Tense Of Youth, I was Inspired by a day trip to Topkapi Palace Istanbul. When told by the tour guide that the upstairs bedrooms of the harem were off limits, I was terribly disappointed and my imagination ran wild. What if I climbed those stairs I wondered? Sadly, unlike Emma, I never got the chance to find out. The rest of the palace though was an absolute eye opener. I mean who knew that women had to wear very high clogs when going to the bathrooms? Yes we were allowed into the bathrooms. Miniature marble palaces in their own right. Even had chandaliers. The sleeping quarters of the young princes were also mind blowing. Dark wooden boxes in which they were shut away from all and sundry. This was to protect them from women, other than their mothers, who would kill them rather than let them become the next Sultan. The Harem quarters had many sections where the women could stroll the gardens and gather in sitting areas or lounges. They were allowed into the main section of the palace only on the reigning Sultan’s orders. They were watched over by eunuchs who had been fully castrated to prevent them trying anything. The Sultan’s favourite was given special treatment and could pick and choose who did what tasks inside the harem. It was similar with the Sultan’s mother who had absolute power and could decide the fate of the current favourite. No man could enter the harem and look at the women inside. Any who tried would be excecuted. They belonged to the Sultan and only he had the right to enter.

It was not until my second trip to Turkey and a second trip to the palace that the story for the novel came to me. I started writing notes whilst on a long trip to Bodrum, Turkey’s Mediterranean Coast. It all starts with Emma who actually does go up the forbidden stairs into the Harem quarters and finds herself drawn back in time.

By Renee Dallow ( Author. )

The Past Tense Of Youth

On Rana’s return I was in the process of preparing for bed. She had been gone at least three hours and appeared quite subdued. ” I am now an odalisque” she sighed and then simply turned on her heel and went to her room closing the door behind her. It was not a happy announcement but I did detect a power behind her voice. I was sure that ‘Hamdi Bey’ was smitten with her and hoped that he had reigned in his conquest with a degree of respect.

I sat on my bed , surrounding myself with cushions and pondered the events of the day. The following day would be a sojourn to a new palace and a visiting opera company no less. Perhaps Rana and I could convince members of the company to help us with an escape plan. All sorts of wild ideas were running through my mind. Where was Gurel? Would he find us? I tried to sleep but could not and knocked furtively on Rana’s door.

She came to the door and spoke to me in a whisper as she rubbed her eyes. She had been crying and I have to say the tears in her eyes made her even more beautiful. “Come” she said ” I need someone to confide in this night”. The young servant girl assigned to her entered from the adjoining room. The girl carried a golden tea pot on a tray with two glass tea cups which she set down on the gilded coffee table in front of the sofa. Rana bade me be seated next to her and poured for the both of us. ” Here’s to my victory” she smiled in a tone of cynical charm.

We sat for many hours into the night as I listened with intent fascination to the story.of her life thus far. I told her all I could of Emine’s life from the fragmented pieces I had obtained from others in the harem. Things that I could not have learned from her diary. Of Emine’s arrival at Topkapi after the long sea voyage from Albania. Of her initial fear of the women of the Harem and of the Sultan who ruled them. Of her terrible nightmares and screams in the night for her dead mother.

In telling Rana of Emine’s journey I lived every moment of it myself. Yet I still knew that it was not of my world. How would Rana have taken it if I had told her that I was not of her time ? She had told me that night of her love for Gurol and of their troth to be together for all eternity. When she spoke his name she was lit from within. I too was there.

She showed me the note he had given her just before her carriage had entered the gate. The note had been delivered by pigeon and dropped at her feet as she alighted. In it was a detailed plan of how he planned to find her inside Yildiz palace.

It was strange indeed to be reading this love note . Even stranger because the content was written in a language completely unfamiliar to me. The fact that I was also speaking another language had not fully dawned on me until that very moment. I was as worthy as she and with that realisation came the acknowledgement of my jealousy.

In this note was also a poem which Gurol had written in his perfect script with flowing hand and impassioned thought. Oh that it were written for me.

As the stars reveal their true ambition To light up the skies as one
They are but lost in transit
And their work can be undone Unlike my love whose light will shine Beyond the night and through the dawn Oh shine for me eternal
And wherever you are bound There I shall be
Forever yours.

A novel By Renee Dallow.

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